Let’s talk about alone time – you both need it

Pinot is adorable; there’s no doubt about that. But when she’s overstimulated, she’s annoying AF. 

Pinot is the type of puppy to go, go, go. If something is happening, she wants to be there. Therefore, it was on me to set ‘downtime’ and ‘alone time.’ 

Alone time was the hardest. 

Pinot gets serious FOMO. If she heard any noise in the house while she was in her crate she would cry and cry and run around in her crate. When I would return, she would be heavily panting having worked herself into a frenzy. 

Sadly, I can’t bring Pinot with me everywhere I go and one day (maybe… hopefully) we will return to an environment where social and business activities can be offline. When that day comes, I need to know that Pinot can spend some portion of the day by herself.

So, every day she spends at least an hour alone. I used to crate her, but as she’s grown my bedroom has become her ‘crate.’ The actual crate is still in my room, and she does voluntarily sleep in it for most of the night, but now she has the ability to switch to the pink chair, her giant bear, or sleep in my closet. I keep a water bowl in my bathroom and a couple of toys so she can entertain herself.

Fun fact: while dogs do not have the same sense of time as we do, they can actually smell time. They can notice that your smell has dissipated throughout the day. My hope is that by having my room as her ‘crate,’ my smell is more poignant and reassuring to her. We slowly worked up from 20 minutes as she got older and gained more freedom. Now we’re up to three hours.

Honestly, it’s hard for me to leave her. It’s hard to consider a life where I don’t spend my days with her loving chocolate-colored eyes popping up next to me for a surprise kiss. 

I installed a Pinot Cam in my room so I can check on her when I leave her for longer periods. Yes, I check it constantly. Even if I am only leaving her for a short period of time. Even if I am downstairs and could hear her if got upset. I find it reassuring, but also interesting to watch her behavior when she’s alone.

Does she sleep the whole time or play with her toys? Does she sleep in a different spot when I’m not in the room? Is she eating a piece of my furniture I wouldn’t normally notice?

Now that she’s almost 7 months old, she doesn’t need constant attention. I am not worried that she’s slinking off to the other side of the house to go potty, instead, I know that she’s actually searching each vent to find dead bugs.

But before, I needed that alone time too. Especially on bad days. Okay, sometimes, I still like the time to have time to myself. A puppy is exhausting; it is a full-time job. They need constant entertainment and supervision, especially when you’re determined not to have any of your parent’s furniture ruined.

Pinot is also starting to like her alone time as well. 

She is figuring out that she doesn’t always have to be by side. She’ll go to sleep on the stone in the other room instead of next to me on the couch. She’ll leave me in my room when I’m working to sleep or watch squirrels by the back door. It tells me that this is becoming her home as well; she’s gaining confidence that we will always be here, and she doesn’t need eyes on us all the time.

I love that she’s finding her place in our home, building her confidence, and overcoming her separation anxiety. But I am still not looking forward to the day I don’t spend most of my hours with her snuggly butt next to me.